I write memoir. I blog. I Facebook everything from the color of my nails to crappy doctor's visits. I am an open book. Those who know me, know me WELL. I do not see the need to be "coy" or "mysterious." #ain'tnobodygottimeforthat I believe in creating and sharing stories(the good, the bad, the ugly) and I know that my stories and experiences need to be shared. I have been through a lifetime in my 29 years on this Earth and I know for a fact that by being open about it I have inspired many. I have enlightened young girls and given hope to women from all walks of life. I do this because it is the only way I make sense of my world and experiences and because writing, performing and sharing my story keeps me from going completely crazy. I strive to be an inspiration and a light for others.
So.. being that I am an empowered and intelligent woman, one would think or expect me to look up to other women who are similar to me. And for the most part, I do look up to those literary giants like Maya Angelou and Toni Morrison. However, like any normal human being, I do have a few guilty pleasures of inspiration. And, because I share EVERYTHING...I must finally confess this:
I am inspired by and keep up with the lives of: Rhianna and Kourtney & Khloe Kardashian. (Yes, I watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians- cue loud gasp now)
THERE! I SAID IT!
So despite all of my attempts to flip the channel when Keeping up with the K's comes on, or to change the radio station when I hear the song The Monster: I. Just. Can't. I am fascinated, impressed, intrigued and even inspired by these women. And truth be told, when you look up their bios, it's pretty damn impressive.
Khloe and Kourtney (luckily, I still loathe Kim) travel the world promoting their brand, running their business and keeping it cool despite the media scrutiny and paparazzi madness. They believe that family is always number one and have each other's backs no matter what. Do I think they lack confidence somewhere in their lives? Yes, otherwise they wouldn't be in such terrible relationships. But I cannot judge their whole worth on the actions of their partners. (And truth be told, who hasn't made some bad choices with partners at least once in their lives?) I think we want to hate them because we envy them. We can't accept that women can be beautiful, smart and successful. But we should. Is their reality tv show about nothing? Of course, but that is only an edited sliver of their entire lives it does not define them even if the media thinks it does. (I still don't follow them on Twitter, that's where I draw the line)
Now on to my artistic inspiration, Rhianna. She is the guilty pleasure I hate to love. Her voice is amazing. Her albums are unique and creative. She is confident, sexy and proud to show it off. However, I hate what she represents for young girls today. Returning to an abusive partner is NOT ok, ever. But I can't even imagine what that must be like, so again, I won't judge. Her choices in her love life do not diminish her artistic achievements and that is what I have learned to understand and accept. So, now when her songs come on, I turn it up and get my groove on.
It's not always easy to admit parts of ourselves that we feel ashamed about. Parts that we think or our mom's tell us should be private. But in doing so, we might help someone else. So, if you've got a guilty pleasure or even a deep dark secret eating away at you, start by taking a small bite (like I did) and share it with even just one person before going fully public. Trust me, in the end you feel a TON better, and those monsters under your bed and those nagging voices in your head will quiet down and not feel so scary anymore.(My male guilty pleasure-Eminem, there I said that too!)